Subscribe
SOOOOOOOOO.
Went to a pre-Watchman viewing party last Saturday, dressed up as the Comedian (bathrobe Comedian, not leather Comedian…. trust me it was the less scary of the two)
Hung out with a friend who was dressed as a pirate, inadvertently got some free booze, overall…I had a pretty great time….before the movie
In case your ADD and don’t wanna read all of this…I came out of the movie saying “meh”
For those that can handle my ranting nonsensically for a page or so though….best buckle up now.
My friend whom I went with, to see Watchmen, she’d never read the graphic novel. After the movie was over with, I asked her what she thought.
Her reply, “It was kinda confusing”
That kinda sums up my feelings on this movie at times.
Watchmen did a lot of things right but also did a LOT of things wrong.
Right:
The opening title sequence. Bob Dylan…moderately sensical Bob Dylan…. played amidst a backdrop of events happening in history which mirrored actual events with a super-hero twist, THIS was the HIGHLIGHT of the movie. You find me a better run of opening credits, stylistically, ANYWHERE…you can’t.
Wrong:
All the other music in the film. I don’t know if they fired the guy that did the music for the first part of the movie or what but, the music in the film, after the opening credits, how it was put into the movie. AWFUL. There are numerous scenes throughout the movie that made me groan but, the one I distinctly remember best is when they tried to intersperse 99 Red Ballons in there. Now…I like the song…anything that has a little German in a song…I’m down…80s music…even more so…BUT…there is a time and place. Playing the music amidst a gritty New York City Street backdrop as Lori gets out of a cab to meet Dan for dinner…..not the time….not the place. I understand Synder was trying to use 80s music, as the text is based in the 80s, but for a scene that is framed somewhat gritty playing the moderately upbeat part of 99 Red Balloons…it brings the viewer out of the movie. To me it was the equivalent of being hit with a bucket of ice water. The light switch of reality came on in my brain “Nick…what the hell are they playing….oh fuck we’re watching a movie aren’t we”. It just wasn’t good. You can add the Hallelujah song when Dan & Lori were up in the Beetle…I mean…”owlship”.
Right:
The fight scenes in this movie. Awesome. I’d go so far as to say that next to the credits they were the best thing about this movie. The scene with Nite Owl and Silk Spectre kicking ass in the prison. FANTASTIC. Your talking to a guy that had already seen it too via a video spoiler on the web….still…even a second time…I got chills. The best part in that fight scene was when they had Nite Owl do that slow motion jump up in the air..then landing down some whoop-ass on the guys below him…aw….yeah.
Wrong:
Sometimes a line of taste was crossed. Watchmen, the novel is violent. I’ve read through the whole damn thing before and I have no problem with violence….the movie sometimes though…went further then the novel to an extent that bothered me. It’s one thing to have Rorschach burn a child-murderer alive, it’s quite another for him to get an f’ing axe and go to town on the guy’s skull….it was played out, and overly gratuitous. Also when Rorschach went to beat up Big Figure in the bathroom…this is more nitpicky but, I somehow doubt Big Figure is a fountain of blood….seriously…did you SEE how much blood was flowing out underneath the bathroom door…what was the guy…a geyser of blood. The last thing, I had a problem with was the fight scene with Lori and Dan in the alleyway. This whole scene was pretty damn accurate to the book but….I don’t remember them killing the thugs…when Lori snapped that one dude’s neck clean around and they stabbed that one dude and used him as basically bulletproof against another thug….I don’t know…I just lost some respect for the characters. Dan & Lori are by no means squeaky clean heroes in the book but, killing people haphazardly like that….it would have felt wrong in the book, as it felt wrong in the movie. After that whole mugging scene, I don’t know, I just had a severe problem liking Lori or Dan all that much in the context of who they were. Lori and Dan weren’t killers…oh sure they busted heads and kicked ass but killing was more in the dark vein of Rorschach…and even with him, Rorschach had some purpose behind when he beat the crap out of somebody…the killings in the alleyway just seemed…chaotic…senseless…and yeah…I had a hard time liking Lori and Dan after that….and Dan is freaking based off Ted Kord….so that’s saying something
Right:
Funky tiger of Ozymandias. Nuff said
Wrong:
Dr. Manhattan is the squid. In the original ending of the novel, a giant squid like alien from an alternate dimension was teleported to New York City by Ozymandias to create mass destruction. NOW….it’s a bit of a hard pill to swallow….even in the graphic novel but, in a world wherein a naked blue guy is powerful enough to teleport a large group of people elsewhere….you can overlook the squid a little. The ending in the movie was….well it was dumbed down an formulaic. I am not saying the ending of the movie was “horrible”. I understand the ending, making Dr. Manhattan as a form of a scapegoat in order to prevent nuclear war by combining two warring forces together against a common foe…it makes sense but…I don’t know…I just wanted to see a giant alien squid….I mean if you can have the damned tiger you can have the f’ing squid
Right:
Rorschach….actor was on point, he managed to do a gravelly voice and not be corny like Bale is when he does Batman. I say kudos to him! I can’t find the video of this anywhere but, when he said the lines below…pure awesomeness.
“None of you understand. I’m not locked up in here with you. You’re locked up in here with me.”
Also…the guy who played the Comedian, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, he played the hell out of the character. I think a lot of people tend to overlook Morgan’s acting as he was only in 1/4th of the movie but, seriously the man played a despicable character really well. (Oh if your wondering where you’ve seen Morgan before, he was the Dad on Supernatural…you know…the one that was a bit of a bastard at times)
Wrong:
Ozymandias..felt too much like a Bond villain…this might have been a combination of the writing and acting though. I half expected Nite Owl to end up on a metal table, laser getting ready to slice him an half:
Nite Owl: Do you expect me to talk Ozymandias
Ozymandias: No Mr. Dreiberg. I expect you to die
The movie as a whole was alright, I guess that’s what I am trying to say. The best comparison I can make is that it’s more From Hell then V for Vendetta in terms of Alan Moore movie quality. Watchmen satisfied some comic fans urging but it didn’t tell a cohesive story as well it should have or could have, and end result, became more a confusing movie then a sensical one 3/4s of the time.
